A Story

INTRODUCTION

How should I begin this
Should I even try
Will you know it’s the truth
Or will you think I lie
This is the story of the voice
That asks if I want to die
This is a story of a strange lad
I

IN THE BEGINNING

When I was born
They didn’t know
What I’d do
Or what I’d show
My father named me
After him
By the suggestion of a girl
Who made money by sin
I would be like him
Only much greater
But the rest of the world
Named me -7ater

WHAT’S THE DIFFERENCE?

When I was in school
I went to a special class
It got me out of a lot of work
And sometimes was a pain in the ass
I was much different
Than the other kids in school
So they decided
That being me wasn’t cool
I got picked on
I got physically abused
And when things went wrong
I got unjustly accused
I was short and ugly
I was weird and fat
I liked science-fiction
And that wasn’t where it was at
They put down all I did
As soon as I entered the door
Could I help it
If my family was poor
But I didn’t care
It didn’t bother me
For my mother put her Love
Inside of me
And my special class
Wasn’t because I was dumb
But because I was better
So I became numb
The people in my class
Had a high I.Q.
We were very smart
But there was something else we knew
Some of us could do
Things others did not know
Special magic powers
That the others didn’t show
We talked to each other
Without speaking a word
And other bizarre things
You would think absurd
So before you make fun
Of something that we do
Decide who is different —
Me or you
For we grew up

INTERLUDE ONE

Can you see yet
You can’t, I bet
I need somebody to talk to
Oh baby can’t it be you
Before I cry
Let me ask you why
Are you afraid to Love me?

MY FEELINGS OR YOURS

When I was 13 I couldn’t feel on my own
All that I felt was all that was known
Was what was around me
And all could see
Was everyone else, but never me
I couldn’t control it
I felt like shit
What was in other people, their emotions
Became me, my internal notions
I felt them fight, talk, and kiss
And I feel your emotions as you read this

WHAT I AM

I am an empath
Do you know what that means?
That means my intentions
Are not what they seem
I can tell what your feeling
How you are deep inside
I can tell what you are
I can tell if you lied
I can tell if you Love me
Or you want me to go away
And when we talk I know
What you want me to say
The power is a gift
And a curse just the same
It could bring me glory
Or bring me to shame
It’s as strong as it is
Because I dealt with the Devil
But I withdrew
Because I’m on the level
When you read this line
You may feel a distraction
Because I’m searching your soul
For a reaction

INTERLUDE TWO

Now can’t you see
What is wrong with me
Why I try to pursue
Being with you
I know how you feel
And it’s making me reel
If you want to make me feel good
And I wish that you would
Just look in my eye
And watch me get high
Then reach over and touch me
And let me feel what you feel

DADDY

I guess I let you down
I was not what you wanted
I turned out to be another clown
Would it mattered if I cared
Why dear father did you put us through
All that you did
Didn’t you know we’d learn to hate you
When you left us alone
And when you were still at home
We dreaded your arrival
Mother felt all alone
And we all felt abandoned
Didn’t you wonder why we went to our room
Whenever you would come home
And I promise by all that’s under the moon
I’ll never do as you did

OH GOD

Why do churches
Where everything’s right
Make me feel
Full of dread and fright
I was to be
A preacher full ordained
And the will of God
I was to maintain
When will we ever learn
How many times must we be shown
That God
Can do it on his own

LOVE?

I knew a girl who was fun
She taught me lots of things
About kissing and petting and holding hands
About marriage, engagements, and rings
My first Love was but naught
Hormones ruled it all
But every time you think you think with your head
You’re actually thinking with your balls
I never slept with her though I could
For she did everything but beg
It wasn’t right, or so I thought
And there I had her pegged
But we had our fun, we had our thrill
And orgasms where a many
For even though we didn’t believe in sex
We had as much juice as any
But when I was convinced that
God thought this was wrong
And that she was listening
To the wrong kinds of song
I sent her away
How I wish
That she’d
Come
Back

LOVE

I was once in Love
My Love was true
Did she Love me?
I wish I knew
I still Love her
I want her to know
But how can I tell her?
Where did she go?
She led a sad life
I taught her to smile
And at least she was happy
For a short while
I really did Love her
And I’d Love her still
But for some reason
This wasn’t her will
For I guess
I did something wrong
What I’ll explain
In my next song

RAPED, LOVED, LOST, FOUND, FORGET

The girl of my dreams
My life I could say
Had something special
Taken away
By someone she knew
Related to her mother
It was her uncle
Her mother’s brother
Her virginity taken away
By force and by lust
Seeds spit in the wind
And lie in the dust
I put him in jail
For his insane crime
And can only now put it
Down in rhyme
Rape is the worst thing
It’s mans own curse
But she was but 12
Which made it worse
She could barely let
Me touch her at all
But puberty hit
And I bounced off the wall
What she had lost
I gave her mine
Then she started worrying
About months nine
She left me alone
Her I couldn’t blame
For she trusted no man
And that is a shame
That was years ago
I’m not over it yet
Even now I feel
Full of regret
The last I heard
She had a husband and a child
And I sometimes stop
And think of something wild
Is the child mine?

LAST INTERLUDE

I’ve gone through much
But I have no crutch
Please don’t worry
Or be sorry
I don’t want your pity
For I don’t feel gritty
All I need you may know
Is to let all this go
Please just let me
Talk to you

NOW

Now I am working at
A job I don’t like
I still feel your pains
Yes, I’m still a psych
I drink way too much
And sometimes get high
When I get too bored
I make up great lies
And when I’m depressed
There’s two things that I do
One is to write my thoughts
The other is talk to you

ENDING

This is my story
It’s no way complete
But my pen and my bed
Are trying to compete
I know that I’ll add
More to this later
Now I go t sleep
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There’s a girl I know

There’s a girl I know who is a little insecure
Who she is inside is something she’s not quite sure
It bothers her that she might not be what she’s expected to be
But she’s the most beautiful person in the world to me
Her outward beauty is the grandest that I’ve ever seen
And her heart is so pure, everything she touches is clean
She’ll do for others what they want even though she may doubt
And when it comes to other needs, she’ll do without
When she sees a little child her heart is full of delight
She tries so hard to fight the wrong, and only do right
When I hurt she’s always there, an angel in disguise
And I see the reason for life from the Love in her eyes
When she smiles at me I see a glimpse of paradise
Her Love melts my heart like sunshine does upon ice
There’s Love aglow and warm in her to calm all commotion
I know that she feels for me, for I can feel her emotion
So even though she may not think she’s what she aught to be
She doesn’t have to improve at all to satisfy me
Often this wonderful girl has inspired this ol’ boy
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I’m just sitting here thinking

I’m just sitting here thinking about you
Wondering why things go just like they do
Then I get a feeling I can’t describe
It’s kind of like a soft-warm vibe
And then I realize the reason I feel so good
It didn’t take long before I understood
My whole life depends on your smiling face
A lot of luck, and God’s wonderful grace
And I Love you so much, I’m overwhelmed
It’s so deep that it belongs in another realm
Your Love encloses me and touches my soul
And just to feel your touch is my only goal
People don’t know me as well as they think
I let you know me by what I put down in ink
But even my pen wont help me to say
Exactly what it’s like to feel this way
The only way for you to know is to let me show you
And then allowing me a chance to better know you
I Love you, that’s the only thing I know for sure is true
And I pray nothing will break up us two
This has been erratic, please understand
I’m trying to tell you the best that I can
That you’re a very important part of my life
And I’m sorry if I’ve put you through any strife
Even I don’t know why I do what I do
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could you do me a favor

Listen pal, could you do me a favor
You see I’m kind of shy
You see that girl over there
Tell her that she caught my eye
Ask her if she believes the phrase
“Love at first sight”
Ask her to sit next to me
Tell her I don’t bite
Ask her if she has a guy
Someone she holds true
Ask her if she’d give him up
And take on someone new
Tell her that she’s beautiful
Tell her I like her smile
Tell her I’d like to be with her
Just to shoot the breeze for a while
Ask her if she’s willing
To take a chance on me
Tell her that I close my eyes
And she’s the one I see
Tell her that without knowing
She fills my heart with Love
Tell her she’s more Lovely
Than earth or sky above
And ask her friend, if you would
What she thinks of me
Ask her what her thoughts were
When she first lay eyes on me
Ask her if she believes real deep
In Love, romance, and caring
If she believes two people
Should try that much sharing
And if she says she does
Tell her I do too
And then look at her and tell her
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rock ‘n roll heaven

Janis sang of freedom
She had nothing left to lose
So she found what she wanted
With heroin, pot, and booze
Jimmy wanted to free his mind
But the music took its toll
So what Jimmy figured out
Was how to free his soul
Jim dreamed of The End
He looked for it everyday
And when it came you wonder if
He had anything left to say
John wanted peace
He talked about it in the sack
But now I can’t Imagine
How he will ever Get Back
Elvis was the king
He brought it all to us
But now he’s gone and I don’t know
What it is with all the fuss
Roy saw a Pretty Woman
And then he started Crying
He was so good we never knew
That he was really dieing
Keith helped out Tommy
Then he broke every rule
But our thoughts always go back
To that night in the pool
Duane was a Ramblin’ Man
He had a lot to teach
And I remember him every time
That I Eat A Peach
Stevie Ray saw the sky cry
He wore out many picks
And even now no one else
Can lay down his licks
Big Bopper wanted to see some lace
Buddy wanted Peggy Sue
Richie didn’t want to fly
And now the world is blue
Kurt was an angry youth
His lyrics we couldn’t figure
But none of his fans could believe
That he’d really pull that trigger
These I’ve mentioned and many more
Left their mark all over the land
And if there’s a rock ‘n roll heaven
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Heaven

I cannot go through this life
With my head so doggone heavy
‘Cause I see us in heaven
You in the passenger seat of my ’57 Chevy
Cruising on forever
Running out of gas never
Hard top and a hatch back
Got a cassette not an 8-track
Fuzzy dice that you’ll only get
When you’re dead
It’ll be jet black or maybe
Cherry red
Supped up engine that will go real fast
A magic moment that will forever last
Stop at the store to buy us some pop
When we dance we’ll do the hop
Fats Dominoe, Little Richard, Buddy Holley
Will be making the scene
The Beach Boys. Elvis, Jerry Lee Lewis
Will make us sing
The twist will be in
Oh can’t you see
This place is looking so much
Like heaven to me
Wearing hats that look so cool
Trying to impress you by acting like a fool
Cloths that are nice and comfortable to wear
We wont be forced to wear socks up there
Poetry to write that no one will read
My grammar wont be right, ’cause there is no need
When I get time
Watch a Star Trek re-run
We’ll fly in a spaceship
Just to have some fun
A Dr. Pepper to make me feel all right
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I miss you

I miss you
Is that so hard to believe
Will I spend my life in sorrow
Will I forever grieve
I don’t think a day goes by
When I don’t think of you
And then I remember you’re not there
And I become depressed and blue
I wish I had known
What I did to drive you away
I just know that I regret
Ever living that day
Life will continue to pass
With or without me
But I wonder sometimes
If I will ever again be free
I thought I knew what Love was
But now I do not know
I have a hard time with
Separating friend from foe
But I thank you for the times we had
I was truly happy for six years
And I should be content with that
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Help me dear one

Help me dear one
Forget what I have lost
Cheer me up and hold me close
For you know not what the cost
Help me to dry my tears
Even though I should not cry
Tell me I’ll be happy again
But then tell me why
Give me an ear that listens
And give me an arm to hold
Give me a shoulder to cry on
And a heart that’s not cold
I need hands that caress me
And legs willing to walk that mile
I want eyes to look in
And a mouth willing to smile
Give me a soul to possess
And a life to share
Don’t forget warmth and compassion
I hope you have some to spare
I need a body to make Love to
To take away the horror inside
I need personality to reckon with
Something to break my pride
What I need most is someone to Love
Because my Love went away
Just be someone who’s there
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A wild dream

A wild dream I had last night
So scary I was filled with fright
I was at Homecoming doing the Cha-cha
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Where did you come from

Where did you come from
The girl of my dreams
I’ve never seen you before
Or, at least, so it seems
But at night while I sleep
Which is something I seldom do
I drift into a world of dreams
And find myself with you
You had to come from somewhere
And where I do not know
Are you the spirit from
That poem by Edgar Allen Poe
Anyway, whoever you are
I’d like to thank you for being there
Because at this time in my life
I didn’t think anyone cared
I look forward to sleeping now
So I can hold you once again
And kiss your lips so sweetly
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